June 10th, 2011
So it's been a few months and here I am again writing to you. Missed me? No? Well either way I've got a lot to say but for my sanity, your sanity, and the sanity of my new son (who is bound to start crying any moment now and pull me away from my blog) I'll keep it brief.
As I look back over the last couple of months I've made some interesting observations and come to grips with many things I thought I could control. Everything I thought about caring for a newborn and motherhood in general has been more or less shaped by reality TV shows, Pregnancy and Newborn magazine, and online shopping frenzies (man do they know how to market baby stuff REALLY well). Wish I could pull a Charlie Sheen and say "WINNING" here but I can't.
Confession #1: I took for granted all the sleep I used to enjoy pre-baby. I can't help but LMAO when I think of all the times I whined and said, "Oh I'm so tired, I only got 5 hours of sleep last night..." I now 'enjoy' 2-3 hours of sleep. 4-5 hours? A huge smile forms on my face every time this fantasy re-enters my still-clouded brain. (and yes, I still have the 'pregnancy-stupids')
Confession #2: I forgot for a moment I had a four-legged furry friend named Chloe. And to imagine I thought I could take on an additional puppy before I had Alec. I think that constitutes admittance to the looney bin. Chloe and I are cool now...but for a minute there I'm pretty sure she was close to placing an ad on Craigslist in the pet adoption section. :( It would've read something like this:
GOOD LOOKING YELLOW LAB SEEKS ATTENTION. ANY. ATTENTION. RESPOND TO 1616 BLACKSTONE. BRING TREATS.
Confession #3: Nothing truly prepared me for this. What I thought I knew about being a mother...all went out the window when I realized that I had to embrace my baby and my new life with the new revelation that well, it's not about me anymore.
Repeat. It's not about me anymore.
And I love that.